28 May 2007, Monday - Out on our own

Ash developed an unknown rash that does not itch the day before. She was not feverish too. That was the problem... a rash that we had no idea what it is. So off we went to the doctor's in a cab with Superpig. He was dropped off at his work place and then we were on our own.



The doctor could not determine what the rash was too. There was no fever and since her high fever was two weeks ago it could not be related. However, he can confirm that it was not a dengue rash so not to worry too much. Was told to sit and wait it out. Prescribed some medication and off we went.


Out of the clinic, then I realised that I need to go to the washroom. However, there was no way I could go with little Aver in my arms. So we went to the nursing room, I asked Ash to help me look after Aver lying on the changing table. However, knowing Ash has her moods, I thought it was not very safe. Saw a lady with her toddler in the room and asked her to help me look over them (a bit scared that she may grab the two and run away... but I prayed that the lady is not a crook) and then ran to relieve myself and ran back immediately. So from this experience, I realised the importance of the pram (which I have yet to learn how to use). However, if its only me and the two girls, I need to travel light, a pram will not allow me to take public transport easily unless it is the taxi (which is very expensive).

After the washroom excitement, it was to MacDonald's for brunch...yes...in the rush to get to the doctor's we did not eat anything. So it was time to fill up the tummy.

With our tummy filled it was shopping time! Bought two hand-knitted shrugs of the two girls. Had always wanted to knit for them but somehow knitting is not something that I managed to master... one day, I promise myself I will pick it up. Since I cannot knit then I had to pay to get what I want.

Once we were done at United Square, took a ride on the MRT to Newton to Ministry of Environment to find Mah Mah. Had a rest there before moving on to the next destination.

Next, hopped onto the MRT to Plaza Singapura. Needed to go to Spotlight to buy some buttons for Ash to do some holiday crafts. By the time, we finished at Spotlight, both Ash and myself were very tired. As for Aver, don't think she was much bothered as long as she had her milk and her sling snuggle in, she should be quite satisfied.

Since we were all tired, I thought we should go on straight home. However, dinner would be a problem as I was too tired to cook. Called Superpig and we arranged to meet at Compass Point for dinner. So off we went onto the MRT and to Sengkang we went.

We had a good dinner at Sakae Sushi... a good reward for myself as I managed to bring the two girls out on my own. A good reward for Ash as she behaved herself and helped me carry our goodies .

I succeeded!

in sewing a quilt for Averlyn.

It is not a perfect one because not every piece is sewed together accurately but still I managed to complete it!

I am so proud of myself.

What's up?

Life is really a challenge everyday.

As Ashlyn grows older she has a mind of her own and so there is this power struggle almost everyday. Till now it is still within my ability to handle. However, there were also days that I was already very tired and my abilty to handle her power struggles is not very good.

Hence, there were days that I shouted and did more to get her to listen to me. I hate myself for being like that. I really do. So now I am telling myself that when I feel myself losing control I have to move away, take a break or simply ask her to stop what she is doing and move away from me for a little while. In so doing, I can cool down and I will not be further irritated by her.

Then there is Averlyn. I guess she must be teething as she has been drooling non-stop and munching her fingers away. She also started to bite when she nursed and that truly hurt a lot. So, I think she could be feeling rather uncomfortable and hence she is not sleeping well in the day and also in the night. In other words, I get no sleep too.

So to prevent another bout of depression, I really have to let go of the idea that I am a superwoman. We decided to engage a part-time cleaner to help with the housework... my part of the housework.

Yippeee... we found one and the first session was two days ago. I am impressed with her ability to clean the common bathroom... I never thought that my bathroom can be so clean. In order to get it that clean, she spent quite some time cleaning it. So the master bedroom's bathroom have to wait till next week. Well, then there is the dusting...okay lah... she did wipe off the massive amount of dust collected on every surface...she did miss some spot but hey, it was her first time here. Overall, I am glad that I can put my feet down on my floor and walk!